14th October 2020

You asked me if you looked pretty,
This was yesterday;
I said, "Yes,"
Bewildered by the question.

Today I asked if it was the headscarf
I was supposed to have noticed yesterday,
Still bewildered by it.

You laughed and said,"What, still obsessed by it
For the last forty-eight hours?"
Although in not so many words.

Therefore, I have sworn, with upheld hand,
That for the next forty-eight years, not hours,
You will not see my face again,
At least not a face that looks at you
As it once did in better times.

I will take no interest in whether you live or die,
Marry or have children,
Grow old and ugly or whatever,
For the next forty-eight years.

Only then will you know who I am;
Only then will you know when I love someone,
I do so with all my heart,
And when I hate someone,
I do so wholeheartedly as well.

Away from me, you whose venom
Was like that of a poisonous snake;
Never again will you stab my heart
With that needle-sharp tongue of yours
For the next forty-eight years,
So help me God.

15th July 2020

Like a bereaved mother

Coping with the loss

Of all ten of her grandchildren

In a tragic boating accident,

Or some such calamity,

So was I.

Your babies,

Eve,

And yours too,

Mama Cat,

And yours too,

Skinny One,

Alas,

It was only yesterday,

It seems,

This household was filled

With the happy sound

Of their tiny,

Or not-so-tiny,

Feet

Whichever the case might've been,

This now silent and empty household,

Silent and empty

Except for four indifferent cats

And one lifeless hooman.

27th October 2019

Banshees shrieking through the night

Amidst the sound of gunfire and deafening explosions

Heralding the arrival of yet another festive occasion of the respective sort

In the middle of the night

Here in fireworks-crazy-firecrackers-loving Malaysia. 

5th July 2019

I have a problem with God.

My cat knew not how to lie,
Cheat, backstab, slander, steal
Or plot the downfall of a rival
By means of treachery

Or even murder. 
Yet it was punished yesterday
With death by agonizing miscarriage
For its sins.
(No one dies innocently, not even infants,
As who knows what atrocities
Infants are capable of in adulthood,
Or perhaps it's to spare them from evil that may befall them

At some point in their lives,
In both cases as foreseen by God.)
So, the question is, 'What sins?
Killed too many sparrows and/or house lizards?'
It was a cat. That what cats do.
That's what cats were created to do.
'Mated with multiple partners?'
It was a cat. That's what cats do.
That's what cats were created to do.
So why did God look the other way
When it was struggling in agony
For the last thirty minutes of its life?
Why did God  include such a horrible ending
In his Holy Script Concerning All Life On Earth
In the case of one insignificant drop-in-the-ocean cat
Who would eventually be named Good-Looking Carlos?
Why? Because he is God and that's what God does?

It is written,

When we call,

He will not answer,

When we plead,

He will look away

For we have forsaken him.

Therefore, when he calls,

I will not answer,

When he pleads,

I will look away

For he has forsaken me

When he killed off my cat,

Yes, killed it off,

For no good reason.

Yes, indeed, I have a problem with God.

[God's imagined reply:]

In what manner would you rather have.it die,

O Foolish One,

If indeed its time to die was at hand?

Killed by a car that ran over it and spilled it guts out

Right in front of your own doorstep

(As was the layout in residential enclaves such as yours)

Or ripped apart by a roaming pack of stray dogs

(Which you yourself have not only encountered in the past,

Mostly late at night,

But also chased away, quarterstaff in hand)?

[Me:]

What are we mortals if not lower than the dirt beneath thy feet.

O Lord, 
For I spoke out of grief from a grieving heart,

Blinded by tears and clouded by sorrow.

You always do what is best for us,

Cat, dog or human

And hence I shall hold my tongue in silence

Lest my foolishness be my downfall.

[God's imagined reply:]

So as it is said,

So shall it be done.

....................................................................................

Good-Looking Carlos
14th Sept. 2018 - 4th July 2019

1st July 2019

All the tears I've cried

For all the ones who died

Means none have I left for you,

My poor sick Ginger Boy, 

Whose end was very near

By tomorrow night I fear, 

My poor sick  Ginger Boy,

My poor sick Ginger Boy.

15th November 2018

I wrestled with the devil from morning until night

(He slipped in through a back door and put up quite a fight)

And though he seemed the victor by early morning's light

He suddenly retreated and fled like one in fright. 

A medico might call it the onset of the flu

(The word that crossed my mind was v-o-o-d-o-o,

Not  African but Asian j-o-o-j-o-o

Or juju more correctly but that I'm sure you knew.)

11th April 2018

Gloat, mine enemies, gloat,

For I have been brought low,

Rendered weak and defenseless,

Not by your own righteousness

But by the fruit of my own hands,

But just as the sun rises again

After darkness has fallen,

So too shall I soar like the eagle

And run fleet-footed like the gazelle

As I once did in the old days

When the gods looked down on me

And were pleased

With what their hands had made.